I have been thinking about writing this for a while now, and with my eating disorder flaring up from finals stress I figured now would be the perfect time.
To everyone who has supported me through my eating disorder,
I wanted to tell you all how incredibly thankful I am of your help and encouragement as I recover. While this disease is obviously destructive and harmful to the person suffering, I know it has also not been easy on you. I understand how frustrating and patience- wearing it can be, and how I am often irrational and can be unkind, but I appreciate you sticking beside me anyways. No matter how long you have been in my life, it honestly means the world.
There have been many moments where I have wanted to give up but the thought of all of you is what simply kept me going. Your steady presence let me know that I was loved and cared for even when that was the last thing that I felt. You have tried to understand without jumping to conclusions and judgment, and even though it might not always make sense to you, simply sitting and listening is a miracle for me. You made me feel heard. You made me feel worthy of recovery, which is one of the most challenging parts of the battle.
I thank you most of all for constantly pointing me to God. You have read the Bible to me when I lacked the energy to pick up the book myself. You prayed with me and for me when I was too numb or panicky for words to pass through my lips. You sent me encouraging verses throughout the day to remind me God was near despite the distance I felt. You pulled me out of bed and brought me to church even on the most exhausting and depressing of days because you knew that is where true healing is found. You kept my eyes focused on the one who can save me, and by this you saved me too.
Now, even in the good times of recovery, you are there to remind me that food is a blessing. Helping me through challenge meals by sitting by my side, reminding me to eat when I get too busy and forget, bringing me food when I leave mine at home, and never making me feel self -conscious of my food choices, you continue to go above and beyond as my friend. And when I do fall, which still happens sometimes, you extend grace and inspire me to get back up and keep going.
Honestly, the loving community you have built around me is one of the main reasons I have gotten this far. Now, I can eat ice cream without crying, I can join my friends in going out to eat, I can go on a date and feel normal again! And yes, these are victories for me, but they are yours as well because without you and God (who you lovingly pointed me to), I would still be lost and in pain.
So, thank you so so incredibly much for helping me get my life back! Your support and encouragement has not gone unnoticed. You will never be able to hear it enough, thank you!
From,
The girl in recovery!
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